I have tipped off my sociopath that I’m aware of what he is, as well as past crimes. He has already subjected me to unthinkable violations. How can I protect myself now?
It’s difficult for me to come up with any specific recommendation as I know not what your relationship was or is with this man … partner, co-worker, family member, supervisor, etc., and for how long. If his past crimes could mean incarceration, your safety could be at risk.
But generally speaking, the number one suggestion would be to move far away with no forwarding information. If he just found out, as you said, your problems are just beginning. He likely believes you are a threat to exposing him, and will always be. Being far away diminishes that threat to some level.
If moving is not an option, which is often the case, then become transparent. Change your phone numbers, your email addresses, etc. You may also have legal substantiation for a restraining order, which must be signed by a judge.
If that’s not possible, a cop can write him up a criminal trespass warning. You would need to call 911 when he was on your property, and express your fear of him. The cops show up and simply write him a warning for criminal trespass. If he steps on your property again, call 911 and he’ll be arrested for criminal trespass.
A restraining order is much more powerful, but you would need to speak with an attorney about going forward with that. Also, as mentioned throughout this site, obtaining hard evidence will only help your predicament, such as audio recordings.
I’m not positive, but I believe that in all 50 US states you can record a face-to-face conversation secretly, but some states require both parties on a phone conversation be aware of the recording. In most states, though, you can record phone calls with just one party knowing, and that’s you. You will need to determine your local laws.
If you decide to go that route, I suggest visiting your local Apple Store and check out their iPods. A sales associate can tell you the recording capabilities of each model (in hours), and then pick up a lavaliere microphone
Do everything you can to avoid him.
Additional reading …
AUDIO: A Sociopath & Disciple Make Their Plans.
The real danger is what you don’t know.
I want to avenge a sociopath. What’s my best option?
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February 15th, 2012 at 07:43
I was reading some startling stats about restraining orders and protective orders. I think it was like thirty percent of the murders occur after someone takes one out. I’m not sure why that would be except that it makes the psycho feel out of control and they have to have the last word. So, I’ve been hesitant to even bother with it. Disappearing sounds like the only way to really get rid of these people for good.
February 25th, 2012 at 17:17
Laure, I read a book that said restraining orders lead to violence. Any kind of public rejection/humiliation is dangerous to do. The author said to wait until the person does something that means the police will arrest him/her and just ignore in the meantime or indefinitely.
February 25th, 2012 at 17:19
p.s. That book was about violent people – not specifically focused on sociopaths.
March 31st, 2012 at 22:09
Violent people = sociopathic people, although I understand you’re just trying to relay information accurately.
April 1st, 2012 at 10:45
I do believe that restraining orders only feed the evil in a psychopath, and force them to take different paths to achieve their goal. But not all sociopaths are violent people; frankly only a very small percent become violent. Most ‘kill’ their victims psychologically.
April 27th, 2012 at 13:49
How in the world do you prove that in court, psychological and emotional abuse are the unseen wounds that drag the target down. “OUCH”
April 27th, 2012 at 14:40
Becca,
I don’t know if you can. When my dad died, my sister abducted my mom and told me that I’d never speak with her again. She died a year later.
But when my sister told me that, I called their local police who said they could do nothing except if there is physical violence. I then called an Elder Association, and not only was I told the same thing, but the woman said it happens all the time. I then called an attorney and he said virtually the same thing, and recommended if I wanted to save my mom, go kidnap her. That’s the truth.
This is not exactly what you are asking, but you can see the pattern that unless there are physical scars, chances are against you. Our legal system is badly broken.
April 27th, 2012 at 15:11
Becca,
The other thing I forget to mention is your county’s Department of Family and Children’s Services. They have specialists who work just with kids. And if they sense trouble, they bring it to court, where they hold a lot of weight.