Each school day in the US, approximately 160,000 kids do not go to school for fear of being bullied. [Source: CDC]

Could a Teen Bully be a Young Sociopath in Training?

I know the life history of two sociopaths, one currently in her early-50s, and the other in her late-50s. In both cases, I believe it’s safe to say they were born with personality disorders. As young children and teens, they were already acting out unpolished characteristics of a sociopath, as it would still require experience for them to hone their narcissistic, manipulating and maliciously-deceptive skills.

Both of these individuals exhibited clear warning signs while they were still minors, even though each displayed them in very different ways. In neither case, did their behavior draw any intervention. So it may be safe to say that it would not necessarily be a simple process to identify young people with one of the sociopathic disorders.

Then again, do we have our eyes open?

THE BULLY SYNDROME  NOW PLAYING AT SCHOOLS EVERYWHERE

As I began looking into the problem of student harassment, a friend of mine gave me the name of a clinical psychologist, Dr. Bob, PhD [not his real name], who’s entire life’s work is focussed on school-aged individuals. He is the full-time, Lead Psychologist at the largest school district in the state (by enrollment), and also maintains a ongoing calendar on the lecture circuit.
continue reading…

 
I used to think we were all pretty much alike … I used to.

I’ve come to believe we couldn’t be more different.

Through youth, the majority of society learns how to create and fill their unique position of fitting into their place with everyone else. But there are many who simply cannot. This first group, though, is no threat to society, whatsoever.

But whether it’s caused partly by their early environment, or from having a few more crossed wires than most (everyone has crossed wires), they could lead much happier and more productive lives if they are simply identified while still very young, and provided the help they need while it will do them the most good. continue reading…

---

 
Sharon (not her real name), 44, is a widow with two kids. Her husband died three months before their second child was born.

When we met, Sharon had been dating Brian for about 6-7 years. Sharon’s kids were in middle school. Brian had been planning a three-day weekend with his buddies to spend in Savannah — about a three hour drive.

On his way out of town Thursday night, Brian swung by Sharon’s and told her he’d stop by her place Sunday evening when they returned. And he did.

While Brian, Sharon and her kids ate dinner, he told them all about the drive down, the flat tire, the hotels, where and what they ate, and all their activities. As she told me, he talked for almost 90 minutes, right through dinner and dessert.

It got late, so he helped put the kids to bed, and a while later, he left. Just as Sharon was turning out all the lights, she spotted Brian’s camera. When he came in that evening, he said he had just a few empty frames on the roll, so he wanted to use them by taking photos of the kids. continue reading…

---

 
At least in my case, I never set out to identify a sociopath. For me, it was usually just a naïve accident, being somewhere to either see or hear something, or innocently ask about something I saw or heard.

I’ve stepped in it twice … with almost ten years in-between.  Frankly, I didn’t step in it the second time, I fell into it.

Don’t believe anyone who says that it’s easy to identify a sociopath. If that were true, it would be equally easy, if not easier, to misidentify a sociopath.

Example: you know someone you suspect is a sociopath because you’ve witnessed (not hearsay) the person displaying sociopathic traits. Suspecting is easy. Identifying likely means you’ve become a victim. Other than that, if you suspect, how do you prove?

If you become suspicious of someone as being a sociopath, you’ve got a couple choices, but with either one, you must be careful and stay observant. How do you become suspicious in the first place? The red flag. Something hits you as just not right. And it matters not how long you’ve known that person, as it could be someone you’ve known all your life.

I know that, for sure. I had just turned 50 when I discovered and confirmed that my oldest sister, Kathy, is a sociopath. Since then, she has done so much damage to my character that it could never be undone.  continue reading…

No, the title is “Not” in error. In the U.S., it is estimated that about 5% to 10% of the general population are sociopaths … that’s 1-2 outwardly-charming people out of every 20 are not really charming at all.

You know 20 people, don’t you?

That’s at least ten million sociopaths in the US. I’ve come to understand — unfortunately, on a very personal level — why they’re considered to be some of the most dangerous people around.

Dr. Stout does a great job of describing someone you know — a typical sociopath. Chances are, there is at least one in your life … at least one. continue reading…